Dealing with mixed emotions at a moment of success
This post was first published on my Medium blog—follow me there for the most up-to-date entries!
Selling a business can be an emotional rollercoaster, even when it’s the right decision financially or strategically. Having been there, I was surprised by the range of emotions I felt. I kept thinking, “This is silly. I’m glad I sold; I should be happy.” But I soon realized I needed to recognize and address these emotions. Let me share my story so you can identify and overcome the emotional impact of selling a business and move forward with confidence.
1. Sense of loss and grief
For me, my business had always been more than just a financial asset; it was part of my identity and my life’s work. It shouldn’t have come as a surprise that the experience triggered feelings similar to grief. I had lost something significant — it was the end of an era.
Packing up my office and discarding so many of my belongings brought a wave of sadness and nostalgia for the days when running the business was truly exhilarating. What would give me that sense of purpose and excitement now? I also felt uncertain about how I would move forward without my name on the door — literally or figuratively. The loss of control and the sense of disconnection from the entity I had built from the ground up were difficult to process. That was compounded by the fact that the buyer wasn’t open having to a transition period, so I had to leave all at once.
2. Relief and liberation
On the other hand, the emotional impact of selling a business can involve immense relief and a sense of freedom. I’ll never forget the first night after the sale closed — I didn’t set an alarm clock. The next morning, I savored my third cup of coffee while lounging in my bathrobe, feeling an unexpected weight lift off my shoulders. The pressure of constant problem-solving and decision-making was finally gone.
Even better, I had sold in late October, knowing that December and January were typically months of poor cash flow. I realized I no longer had to stress over where every last dime was coming from. The months of work leading up to the sale had been stressful, time-consuming, and overwhelming. Now, I felt I could finally kick back, explore a fresh start, expand my coaching endeavors, or simply take some time off. The financial stability from a successful sale gave me a newfound sense of peace.
3. Pride and accomplishment
I had poured years of hard work into building a successful business, so I felt an undeniable sense of pride. I never imagined I’d be in a position to sell it; I had nearly resigned myself to the idea of simply closing the doors and accepting the financial loss. Selling the business, however, provided a tangible acknowledgment of my efforts and achievements.
Ironically, despite preaching to my coaching clients about the importance of celebrating their wins, I had been so caught up in the whirlwind of preparing for the sale that it hadn’t occurred to me to celebrate my own success. In hindsight, I wish I had been intentional about doing so. It might have helped amplify my sense of accomplishment and soften the impact of the less-than-positive emotions I experienced.
4. Anxiety and uncertainty
At the beginning of the process, I didn’t feel I had the necessary expertise to approach my sale with confidence— it was more of a fly-by-the-seat-of-my-pants approach. I had to learn the process as I was doing it. But even if it had been more structured, I still would have felt stress and anxiety after closing.
Be prepared: The emotional impact of selling your business can be profound. I worried about the future of the business under new ownership and how the transition would play out. I wanted the new owner to succeed and feared that an unorganized approach could jeopardize that. I also worried about my team, knowing that the new owner’s leadership style was very different from mine. My heart ached for them, but a friend reminded me, “Not your circus, not your monkeys.”
The one thing I didn’t question was whether selling was the right decision; I was certain of that. (I was very sure of my “why” before selling.) But I did, and still do, worry about the bumpy journey of the transition. I also felt uncertainty about life after selling. The experience was so anxiety-inducing that I felt compelled to help other small business owners navigate the emotional impact of selling their business — hence this post.
Your experience may be different. You might wonder if you’ll find fulfillment in retirement or new pursuits or how a sudden lifestyle change will affect you.
5. Fear of losing purpose
Anxiety around losing your purpose is often part of the emotional impact of selling a business. Thankfully, I didn’t fear losing my sense of purpose. I had already started my coaching business, so I was looking forward to growing that. If you don’t have your new gig lined up, though, you might find yourself losing your sense of purpose when you no longer run a business. This can create a feeling of being adrift or unsure of your next chapter.
If you don’t have something lined up, don’t fixate on it. You might not have the strength to figure it out right now. True, moving through your day without a purpose doesn’t feel good. But just give yourself some space. I truly believe you’ll find your purpose once you feel more rested.
6. Guilt and doubt
I felt guilt after the sale. The impact on employees went beyond finances; it was emotional and practical. It was far bigger than I could have anticipated, and deeper than I can disclose here. These employees were long-time teammates I considered part of my corporate family, so I wanted to help but felt powerless.
I also questioned whether the new owner would uphold the values and mission of the business, which made me uneasy. Maybe? Maybe not? I didn’t know. Even though I knew I had made the right decision for myself, I struggled with self-doubt. The dramatic changes that followed left me wondering if I had made the right choice for them as well.
Also, it felt to me like I could no longer talk to them. I didn’t want to blunder into giving them directives or otherwise usurping the power to the new owner.
7. Excitement and anticipation
The emotional impact of selling a business can also be positive. I certainly felt excitement, anticipation, and optimism as I looked ahead to what was next. Those feelings have been present every day. However, sometimes the excitement was overshadowed by just plain feeling wrung out from all the months of preparation.
Coping strategies
If you’ve experienced any or all the emotions I’ve described here, know that you’re not alone. Don’t deny or ignore these feelings — take steps to conquer them. Here are a few coping strategies that helped me:
Take time to process: Allow yourself the space to process the emotions that come with selling your business. I leaned on close friends, family, and even a therapist who understood the unique emotional impact of selling a business.
Celebrate achievements: Reflecting on what my business had accomplished and recognizing the sale as a major milestone helped me frame the experience in a positive light. Celebrating those achievements would have made it even better.
Plan for the next step: Setting new goals and creating a post-sale plan gave me a roadmap for life after the sale. It took me several weeks to figure out how to structure that plan, because I was emotionally exhausted.
Seek support: Support from mentors, professional advisors, or a network of fellow entrepreneurs who have navigated similar transitions can be invaluable. Need a coach? Book a discovery call with me!
The emotional impact of selling your business is complex and multifaceted. The sale is a significant life event that blends personal and professional growth. Recognizing and navigating these emotions thoughtfully is essential for all business owners.
Are you prepared for the emotional impact that comes with selling your business?
This post was first published on my Medium blog—follow me there for the most up-to-date entries!